Wednesday, 12 December 2012
This is a very personal post. Just a warning.
So hi, this is me,as you know I'm Kel and I am unlucky in love. When I say unlucky I mean ridiculously unlucky, like what the?
I'm not even sure why. I personally think that I have a lovely personality. I'm very easy going which I can see why I put up with things I shouldn't. I'm a nice person which I know is the reason complete weirdo's head my way, I have a nice face and I think this is why they like to chat to me. I'm not an ugly person but looks aren't the be all and end all with me, this I know is half my problem. As my mum told me water finds water in my case not so much. Sometimes for the man he tries to find his water and well that just messes with a whole heap of self esteem issues.
Moving on, what I'm wanting to say is that I try to find love. I'm careful with my love. I don't just fall in love, I like to take my time and 'try' to pick well. My problem is that when I do fall I fall hard. I want to see the best in everyone and I want to believe that my spouse is everything I want them to be. It hasn't happened yet but one day, I have faith. If it doesn't happen that's ok too I just hope that I am saved the hurt because when you fall for someone and they aren't the right person, don't feel the same way about you or your personalities just don't mesh it hurts. It hurts bad and it hurts over and over again. Unfortunately for me, I know that hurt. I knew it the whole time I was in that relationship and I still know it now it's over.
I love music and I listen. I really listen and when I get fixated on a song I like to know why. Why am I listening to this non stop? What is it telling me?
Well I found one. This one is beautiful and I think you will agree, it was talking to me.
My song at the moment is Mumford & Sons 'After the Storm'.
'And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With Grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.'
So I have faith that love will not break my heart.